Our first reviewer comes to us from deepest, darkest Florida. He's the author of such disturbing works as Learn to Surf and Hitchhiker's Handbook. In his spare time he sends random, unsolicited emails to ezines around the world...

Death Scenes, edited by Sean Tejaratchi, Feral House, 1996 reviewed by Jim MacLaren

Well, here it is. The coffee table book from hell. Death Scenes, A Homicide Detective's Scrapbook.

Yep. It's exactly what you think it is. But with a few twists. First off, everything is black and white. That's because the scrapbook this little jewel was mined from was assembled by a guy on the homicide squad who worked from the twenties to the early fifties. A black and white era if ever there was one. Second off, there's just a smidgen of other weird photos too. Stuff that properly doesn't "belong" in this collection of unbelievably gruesome shots. Aside from that, it's basically wall to wall dead people with a slant towards the ironic, odd, and hideous.

Try this thing out on your oh so bad boy friends. Stay away from the ones that like it.

Or maybe leave it on the coffee table when people you don't really like drop by for a visit.

This is an ugly book, filled with ugly pictures. It even manages to smell strange. Like fingerprint ink or something. And the black borders around every page give it an ugly, blackish cast, even when it's laying there closed. All in all, it was put together just about as "good" as something like this can be done. Way to go, Sean.

Aside from the foregoing, what else can I say? Not much, really. A black and white picture book chock full of corpses. A great gift for that special loved one.

Our next review comes from Ten Jiks, a Finnish girl who 6 years ago ran away from an abusive proto-communist boarding school and now lives on the streets of Helsinki. Because of that city's pioneering free email program, she now emails us 3-4 times a day with her reviews. Here's one of our favorites:

Hello Again. I am realizing that my english is not best, but for this I am not sorry. I spit on sorry. Sorry is for weaklings, of which I am not. Here is latest review for the great usounds magazine, my saviors of the world...

this day i was not happy so i stole this album from local store called This is Stereophonic Sunshine. Put out by Sandcastle Records it contains such famous bands as Cessna, Red Sleeping Beauty, and Metronome.

I think this music will make me happy, I put it in player and listen. It is all pop songs of such joy that I smile, I dance in park and other people stare at me, thinking "what does this idiot girl have for happiness? she is just dumb girl"

This makes me angry. So I punch faces and blood is everywhere. All the while sweet music whispers through headphones in my ear and I am keeping punching, more and more, until orgy of blood runs down the streets, calling for salvation, but there is none because god is dead and always was!

But back to music. I like the most Cessna, which is from my home of Finland. However, I spit on Finland. Dirty whore of nation, it is like me...just beaten into ground by all, left for dead on city streets and spending days in jail without comfort. I also very much love the wistful sounds of Watoo Watoo of France.

Their guitar reminds me of Blueboy and the singer has the most delicate voice, so sweet and kind as it slips into the sadness that I also know...  that night i found myself humming those tunes to myself as I smeared goat feces on the gravestones of people with last names that did not fancy me.

Also on the album is the excellent two-piece Swedish band Club 8. The singer's voice is so gorgeous it makes me scratch at my own throat with ragged nails in desperation. I love it I love it I hate everything else.

Thank you, friendly usounds, until next time, tenji@wowmail.com

 

USOUNDS || 1999

Buy Them:
Learn to Surf
Hitchhiker's Handbook

Death Scenes : Publisher> Feral House

This is Stereophonic Sunshine